When ABC (a baby cries)

Some would want to search and drink in the fountain of youth  to be young forever but I need more than this. I want to ask Cronos (the God of time) to let me go back to the day that I was born, stay there, and repeat it over and over again. 


I imagine when I came into my family's life. Just like every baby, I was adored by all. Mom kissed me. Dad hugged me. My grandparents, aunts, and ninangs always wanted to carry me. Everyone seemed to like my adorable chubby little figure.


No one did hate me. They even said I was a blessing, a gift from above. A being that bound together my parents as one. We three created a happy family.


Time was of priority to me. They never missed a thing when it comes to my concern. I was fed on time. I had their full attention. My firsts were big deals for them. 


I was their subject for every picture. They made me wore fancy costumes. 


I made my parents laugh when I chuckled loudly. They did everything-fed with bottled milk, played teether, and even made fun of their selves- just to make me stop for those times I cried.


For some reason, though I can't really remember these things, I knew it somehow by heart. That's why I wanted to go back from being a baby and cherish the most of it, forever. 


I am missing those days when my Mom and Dad used to hug and kiss me every start and end of the day as if tomorrow will not come again. After a year or two, I was handed over to my relatives. 


Before, I was a blessing but now, a burden to keep. We were supposed to be a happy family not a broken one. I was left in the middle with no one to run to. 


Unattended and set aside, that's me. Today, no one would pay attention. No one really cares. They don't even offer such affection. I am not enough for them to be proud of. To them, I am not worthy to be loved.


Today, no one recognizes me. We are all apart like a family picture torn into pieces, connected by blood yet separated by distance of heart.


Not a chance to make them laugh nor cry. They don't know me anymore. They had lost me. Without acknowledgment, they created a path that got rid of me. they did everything wrong. 


19 years had past. I hid so many hard feelings for them. It can't be spilled in one spit so if Gods can hear me, let me go back.


I want to be a baby once again. A baby whose innocence hides behind smiles and laughters. An innocent from hurt and reality. 

-end-